Feelings Untold I Should Say I'm Sorry
by phantom4angel
Summary: Oneshot. Lloyd Irving saying what he needs to. Possible Sequel along the way. Review if you like it!


**I don't own Tales Of Symphonia, just writing a little bit about them. One little blip of feeling just coming out. Review if you like!

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**The Vocals Of Lloyd Irving**

**Feelings Untold…I Should Say I'm Sorry

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How many times have you said I'm sorry for something that wasn't your fault? How many times had it been mine and you still apologize? I should've protected you, I should've saved you, I should've known how things were going to turn out and here I am, listening to your voice inside my head saying "I'm sorry" again and again. I know you worry when I do, I know you don't want me to, but I don't care. No matter what, how, or why I'm going to worry.

When you lost your taste I was worried, when you weren't eating I was worried, when you were coughing I was worried, when you were hurting I was worried. Don't say you're sorry, don't say it again.

When you lost your voice I felt like I had to be yours, and I missed your voice…it was my fault for not stopping you…

I should have seen that it was hurting you more than you let on, how could I let you become a hollow shell? How could I have let you down like that and yet you still apologize? It wasn't your fault about anything, not about Iselia, not about Sylvarant, not about loosing yourself.

I know you thought it was for everyone, to regenerate the world was your one and true destiny, so how were you supposed to know it was going to kill you in the end? I mean, you'd think I would have said no after we heard all of the other chosens had died. I…I should have seen it.

I'm sorry I didn't finish your necklace in time for your birthday, but at least it was good for something, bringing you back to me. In a way, when you came back that little part of me, that part of me that I wanted to give to you came back, I wasn't so empty anymore.

Even when your voice was gone you still apologized when it wasn't your fault, even when you were dying…but you can't say it anymore, because you don't have any reason to feel sorry. I should, I do, I'm sorry for not being there, for not seeing you like I should have.

You fight with grace, your laugh makes me smile, your clumsiness is only yours and you leave an imprint on everyone you meet. If anyone hates you they don't know you, not like they should. You're good nature, and…you're my favorite person in Iselia too…just to let you know. You've got a good heart, a beautiful face and a smile that I'd love to see again. When things get down I know you'll always be there to try and cheer everyone up, to be the one person that can make everyone smile and laugh. You light up a room when you walk in, even if you trip a little, and I'm not talking about your wings either, just your face, your soul.

All in all it wasn't about regenerating the world, or finding a way for both dimensions to live without destroying the other, I mean that was a big part of our journey don't get me wrong, but…all I really wanted from it was to be with you and to make sure you got back okay…and that you wouldn't forget me, especially since I forgot to give you your birthday gift. You're the one person I can trust, I know that just because of what time we spent together, and I thought you should know that…

Through all the battles and through all the trials you were the person—are the person I can count on, I mean sure I got the others but…its different with you, in a good way don't get me wrong. I wouldn't have it any other way just to make sure you know that.

Remember the snow? You looked so pretty that night…I should've said this then, or at least some of it then, maybe it wouldn't be so hard now.

I'm not very good at saying the right thing, doing the right thing, being the right person, but I know that everything we've been through and every road we've chosen is for a reason. I'd like to think the place I'm supposed to be at is with you, and the road I was supposed to take was yours, or next to yours or something.

In the end all I have to say is…I'm sorry if I let you down...and I'm sorry I let you disappear…and I'm sorry I didn't tell you all this earlier…I thought we'd have a lot more time I never thought that I'd have to choose a time to tell you. Sometimes things just end up coming out at that one moment, you kind of know what I'm talking about?

I never told you how much I missed you when…well you…were separated from your body… I felt like something had been ripped out of me when you had to go and that once you said goodbye…you were gone…for good. Something died inside me, honest, but once you came back, once you finally woke up again, I did too.

Colette, I'm sorry for all the things that have happened to you that I know I could've prevented, for all the things I did to you without thinking, for everything that you had to experience on your own, for everything that you didn't deserve, for all the lies that they fed down your throat, for all the truths we had to find on our own, especially the painful ones. If you can find it in your heart to forgive me and not say I'm sorry back, but instead just smile for me…that'll be thanks enough.

You and I make a great team, you know that? You're most of the heart and soul of it and I'm just learning from you and trying to make sure you're alright. I'll take care of you from now on Colette, and if I don't then I'm sorry for that too, you don't have any reason to be sorry anymore, you remember that…Lloyd.

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